What if I’m not ready to be a father?
What if I disagree with my partner’s pregnancy decision?
What are my rights and responsibilities as the father of the baby?
Am I the father?

If your partner recently told you she’s pregnant, you’re likely asking all these questions and more. Whatever you’re thinking or feeling, it’s understandable, but it’s essential to take a deep breath and stay calm. There are steps you can take to gain some clarity right now.

Listen to Your Partner

Your partner likely feels even more overwhelmed than you, and listening to her is essential. Afterward, you can share your thoughts, feelings, and concerns as well, with the goal of having a meaningful dialogue where you both feel valued and heard.

During a high-emotion situation, allowing your partner to talk and actively listening can often help ease tensions and reveal a clear path forward. Actively listening means more than just hearing what your partner is saying; it means asking questions to help your partner go deeper in her thought process.

If she says she’s scared about being pregnant, ask her why and then share your feelings. An open conversation will give you both the space to work through your thoughts.

Active listening is also about maintaining eye contact and avoiding distractions. When your partner shares her thoughts, put your phone down and give her your full attention.

Help Your Partner Research Her Options

Your partner might not know how she wants to proceed with the pregnancy. One of the best ways to support her is to help her fully understand her options. 

Your partner’s pregnancy options include parenting, adoption, or abortion. You can help her find information about these options and also help her work through her feelings about each one. You will also have feelings and opinions about which option is best.

While it’s okay to share your feelings, it’s important not to make your partner feel pressured into one choice; instead, tell her how you feel, but let her know you’re there to support her decision.

Seek Support

If you’re worried about becoming a father or need emotional support, we’re here for you. At True Women’s Center, we understand that, as the father, you are deeply impacted by your partner’s pregnancy news. This is why we offer no-cost, one-on-one Fatherhood Mentorship opportunities. Mentorship gives you the time and space to meet with an experienced fatherhood mentor who will share tips, insights, and advice for parenting. 

You’re not alone in this. Reach out today to schedule a confidential appointment.